Whether you opt for traditional cards or digital stationery, sending out your wedding invitations is a super exciting milestone. But have you thought about the etiquette involved in addressing your guests?
From navigating plus ones, families and kids to setting the right tone for your event, we’re sharing our complete guide to addressing your wedding invitations below!
Let’s Talk About Tone
Before you get started with addressing your wedding invitations, take a moment to think about the overall “theme” of your day. Are you planning a traditional sit-down reception? An informal backyard barbecue? An intimate garden party?
Remember, your wedding invitations are essentially the first glimpse your guests will receive into your upcoming celebration, so use your invitation wording to set the right tone moving forward.
For example: if you’re planning a sophisticated, elegant wedding, you might want to address your guests using formal wording and traditional titles. But, if you’re planning a more relaxed celebration, you can address your guests informally to better reflect your event.
Of course, there’s absolutely no right or wrong option – it all comes down to your wedding vision and the kind of impression you want to make! Keep reading as we run you through some of the different invitation scenarios, and how to address each one:
For Married Couples (Shared Surname)
To address a married couple with the same surname, simply list both names separated by the word “and”. Not sure which name to put first? Don’t stress – in today’s modern society, there are no rules or expectations on this. You might want to make a general rule and apply it across all invitations to make the process easier, such as alphabetical order, or the guest you’re closest to.
Refer to these examples from the most formal to least formal:
Mr Harry Smith and Mrs Sally Smith
Mr and Mrs Smith
Harry and Sally Smith
Harry and Sally
For Married Couples (Different Surnames)
Again, you’ll want to follow the same process of listing both guest names, this time with their respective surnames (or simply first name only for a more informal invitation):
Mrs Beverley Jones and Mr Bob Peters
Beverley Jones and Bob Peters
Beverley and Bob
For Unmarried Couples
When addressing couples who aren’t married, simply swap “Mrs” to “Ms” for female guests if you’ve chosen to use traditional titles:
Mr James Workman and Ms Sandra Parks
James Workman and Sandra Parks
James and Sandra
For Families (Kids Invited)
Addressing families can get a little trickier, as guests will need clarification on whether their kids are invited, too. If children are welcome, be specific about this by addressing your invitations to include all family members.
When listing multiple kids names, simply order them from oldest to youngest. Traditionally, anyone over the age of 18 should receive their own invitation. Use these examples as an outline:
Mrs Polly Sue and Mr Christopher Sue
George, Penelope and Michael
Mr and Mrs Sue
George, Penelope and Michael
Polly and Christopher
George, Penelope and Michael
The Sue Family
For Families (Kids Not Invited)
If you’re hosting a child-free wedding, be sure to set the right expectations by only addressing the names of the parents (refer to the relevant “couples” examples above!).
It’s possible that some guests will still assume their kids are invited, so you might want to respectfully note the child-free nature of your event on the invitations themselves – or better yet, via your wedding website. You can find some great wording examples for tricky situations just like this on the blog!
For Singles (Plus One Offered)
If you’re offering a plus one for single guests, simply add “and Guest” after their name:
Ms Jemma Watts
(and Guest)
Jemma Watts
(and Guest)
Jemma
(and Guest)
For Singles (No Plus One)
Simply address your guest by name, either formally or informally.
Again, you might want to make a gentle note on your wedding website to clarify this if you’re worried about unexpected guests showing up. For example: “Due to space constraints at our venue, we are regrettably unable to extend invitations for additional plus ones. We appreciate your understanding and look forward to celebrating with you!”
Invitation Etiquette Tips
Ensure your wedding invitations are received seamlessly with these final etiquette tips:
- If you’re unsure about someone’s preferred title, the spelling of their name or postal address, just ask! It’s better to clarify the correct details upfront instead of accidentally offending someone, or having their invitations lost in the mail.
- When it comes to wording the postal address of your guests, follow the same tone you’ve used for their names. For traditional wedding invitations, be sure to spell out their postal address in full without abbreviating. For informal wedding invitations, keep it simple.
- You’ll also want to continue the same tone throughout the wording of your invitations themselves and your wedding website. You can find 10 wedding invitation wording examples you can copy word for word right here, along with our helpful guide on filling out your wedding website sections.
Sending your wedding invitations is an exciting part of the wedding planning journey, so take a moment to enjoy the milestone, too! From here, your big day is only just around the corner.
